Whenever I meet somebody new, New Person and I exchange the requisite getting-to-know-you questions. The number one question is, of course:
“What do you do?”
An easy enough question to answer, and I’ve gotten a whole lot better at answering it than I did when I wrote this post over a year ago.
But 99% of the time, New Person throws a follow-up question at me:
“What’s your book about?”
And here is where I choke.
Yes, I’ve written a novel. Yes, I remember what it’s about. I’ve spent so much time with my characters and plot that I damn well have the whole thing memorized by now.
But ask me to verbally explain to you what my book is about, and I sound worse than Porky Pig.
I stutter. I stammer. I avert my eyes. I babble. I trip over the words sex and addict and serial and killer. I feel my face turn red. I giggle even though nothing’s funny. I speak in run-on sentences with no pause for breath and I talk and talk until I can’t breathe and the New Person I’ve just met is wishing she’d never asked the damned follow-up question in the first place because it clearly pains me to answer it.
And when I finally stop talking, I see three expressions flit across New Person’s face.
The first is relief, because she was really uncomfortable watching me go through that, and she’s glad it’s over. (Not that I blame her.)
The second is that falsely bright look, the look that says, “I’m interested, really I am, but I have no idea what the hell you just said.” (Again, I don’t blame her.)
And finally, we come to the third facial expression. Whether it be the skeptical brow furrow or the slight twitch of the lips, it’s the expression that very clearly says (without actually saying anything at all):
“You’re a writer? Seriously?”
And of course, I don’t blame her. Because let’s be honest… after thirty painful seconds of stuttering and quite possibly showering New Person’s face with my nervous spittle, I sure as hell don’t sound like a writer.
But I am a writer. I swear. And I really did write a book. A big, fat book with a title and words and chapters and everything. It’s a real book. I promise.
Just please, don’t ask me to talk about it.
And that one minute summary may be your salvation if you ever go to a writer's conference, and you meet an agent who says, "What's your book about?"
"About 400 pages," is not the answer that will get you that agent!
You have an intriguing blog. I enjoyed this post, Roland
I agree it can be tough.
But since you've already sold your book why don't you just memorize your Publisher's Marketplace blurb? 😉
I second that from Jen's post (memorizing your Publisher's Marketplace blurb).
I've told everyone and their grandma about my cousin being published! When they ask me what the book is about, I quote that blurb! 🙂
Yes, I absolutely HATE the what do you do question. People that know me, and know me well still don't get what my company does.
It's easy to say I'm a Corporate Trainer, but the follow up question is, "What does your company do?" I don't choke though, I just look at my watch and ask them if they have at least 15 minutes to spend with me to find out.
Usually they don't. 🙂 🙂
I can SO relate to this. I finally came up with "It's about a girl who's father kills her mother and then stalks her for the remainder of the book." It's not snappy, but it gets the job done because invariably the person doing the asking says, "Ooooo, it's a thriller." Good enough for me!
Of course, the PM blurb is what I should have said! But I think because I didn't write it, I'm having a hard time remembering it.
I must practice.
Joann, yours sounds perfect. 🙂
Oh my gosh Jennifer I love your blog it's so cool! Not to mention this post completely rocks so I followed you even before I commented, I didn't want to chance losing your blog!!
Yes of course this is a tough one, and everyone looks at me when I give them the same dumb look, you think I'd work harder to come up with an elevator pitch but I just stare blankly at them, coming up empty. Oh what to say, what to say.
I've given this more thought and have come up with a solution to your problem. Print the PM blurb on a business card. Then just hand it over. You'll come across as mysterious, but they'll still know what your book is about.
Jen (who wrote 10,000 freaking words in the past two days and should be forgiven for her insanity)
I like this idea! No chance I might stutter. Ha.