The one question I’ve been getting a lot since CREEP was released last summer is, “Is your main character, Sheila Tao, really you?”
To which I always answer, “HELLS NO.”
Allow me to bullet point the ways she and I are alike:
- She’s of Asian descent, and so am I. (But she’s Chinese, and I’m Filipino.)
Allow me to bullet point the ways she and I are NOT alike:
- She’s a sex addict.
- She’s a psychology professor.
- She had an affair with her psychopathic teaching assistant.
- She’s engaged to an ex-NFL player who’s now an investment banker.
- She’s American.
- She’s a sex addict. (Yes, worth repeating.)
- She’s not real.
I think people ask if Sheila Tao is me because in readers’ minds, she looks like me. A friend of a friend read the book, and said, “I’ve never met Jenny, but because her photo is at the back of the book, it’s her face I imagine saying and doing all those nasty things.”
Grrrreat. Maybe I should have written Sheila as a blue-eyed blonde!
But here’s the thing: I never set out to make Sheila an Asian character. I never set out to make her a version of myself. Authors have been known to do that (Lee Child’s Jack Reacher looks an awful lot like him, as does Jonathan Kellerman’s Alex Delaware), but Sheila started out as a minor character in early drafts, someone who was floating around in the background. I didn’t realize until the second draft that she deserved to be in a starring role, and of course by then it never occurred to me to question whether her being Asian mattered.
I didn’t set out to make Morris, her love interest, white. That’s just how he turned out. And I didn’t set out to make Jerry, the retired cop, black. That’s just how he turned out.
And in hindsight I’m really glad it turned out this way. I’m happy to contribute to ethnic diversity in fiction, especially in mainstream thrillers, where I don’t see too much of it. I’m also happy to contribute to sexual diversity, which my book addresses as well.
I’m certainly aware now that my characters had to be influenced by my own life, because my life is very multicultural. I guess this is where the “write what you know” adage comes in. I was born and raised in Toronto, one of the most multicultural cities on the planet. My grandparents have Spanish and Chinese roots. My maiden name is Spanish. My father’s mother was half-Chinese. My brother married a Portuguese girl and they have three cute kids. I have a cousin who’s half-Latvian and a nephew who’s half-Italian. I have friends of all races β my three best friends are Chinese, white, and black. And that’s just the tip of it.
Not that it really matters. Because my family is just my family, and my friends are just my friends.
It’s not that I don’t notice other people’s ethnic origins. Of course I notice. I’ve got eyes. But rarely does it occur to me to ask someone “what they are”. Because growing up the way I did, everyone is “something”, and you stop being curious after awhile. But I do get the “What are you?” question myself all the time.
Here’s a conversation I had a few months ago with a man who’d called to interview me about CREEP:
“So, are you half-Asian?” he asked.
I was totally caught off guard. I wasn’t sure what my ethnicity had to do with my writing process. Finally I said, “No, I’m all Asian. All the time.”
Long pause. He said, “Was that a stupid question?”
I just laughed. I honestly wasn’t bothered or offended. I get that inquiring minds want to know. It’s not a stupid question at all.
Do people ask you what you are? If so, what are you? π
Interesting, well-written post.
Yes, I often get asked. My answer: I'm a human being.
People tend to ask me if I'm Swedish, since I look extremely Swedish. The only time this ever came off even remotely insulting was when I was in Norway. That was kind of weird. :p in truth, I'm just another Euro mutt. A bit of Swedish, a bit of everything, but mostly German.
I get the "what are you?" question all the time too. (Since you asked, I'm African American and Haitain :)) I never mind answering but people are typically surprised to hear the answer. Most people think I'm hispanic.
She's a sex addict. (Yes, worth repeating.)
Denial is the first sign…
While you wouldn't necessarily need to be offended, I would have at least been annoyed. What the hell does my ethnicity, half or otherwise, have to do with the book, jerkhole?
I'm sure you remember my blog entry on this very same subject a while back, so you already know my answer. π I personally get pretty annoyed by it, yet at the same time I understand that people are curious. I still hate the question so much!
But I tell them straight up that I'm half this, half that. I guess it helps that I don't really identify with any one culture. Like you, I grew up amidst such a melting pot of influences.
I admit I did wonder at first if Sheila Tao was a Mary Sue of sorts. But as I continued to read, and with the little I already knew about you, it became obvious that she was definitely not you at all. I used to write some dark, twisted stuff in college, and I can't tell you the number of times I got the remark: "Oh, are you writing about your own life?"
Uh, no. It's called "fiction" for a reason, people!
This post cracked me up. What a perfect comeback to that interviewer!lol
I never pictured you as Sheila but then I was pretty positive before I read Creep that you weren't the type to be a sex addict. (I totally snorted when I typed that.lol)
Oh and FYI: My family is like a minature rainbow coalition too. We need Asians though…you have any available nieces?lol Sorry, I couldn't help it. We could be related!!!
I am not a sex addict!
Anymore.
I'M KIDDING.
But now you guys made me say it three times here, which makes me seem like I'm totally in denial. LOL.
Jenny's not a sex addict. It's all those people she's sleeping with that have the problem!
I like Joseph! He's funny!! And Jenny, you do have a degree in psychology. So Sheila's not too many steps away. But you know what's funny, at least for me, is that even though I knew Sheila was Asian, I never really pictured her that way. Go figure.
I love your answer for "all Asian, all the time." That's brilliant. I also never pictured you as Sheila Tao since she's Chinese.
Having studied a little bit of cultural anthropology, I think it is interesting to know a person's ancestry background and different cultures beliefs and such, but it's more an academic interest than anything else.
As for myself, if you look at my last name, you can tell my ancestors were German, but they were also British, Scottish, Welsh, and Irish. Those are the main ones I know of.
Ha, I love your answer to the interviewer! And don't worry, I didn't ever think you were a sex addict. π
I'm definitely . . . a mutt. And I pictured Lucy Liu (sp?) while I was reading Creep!
Oh heavens yes. I'm English but live in Texas, so it's not the way I look but the way I sound. People usually ask if I'm from Australia, at which point I punch them. π
Great post! I'm as white as they come but I've had friends from all ethnicities throughout my life. One friend in particular got that question a lot, "What are you?" She used to answer: "Does it matter?" which I thought was pretty awesome. BTW, I too envisioned Sheila as Lucy Liu! Also I think it's tough for readers sometimes to separate the author from the work.
Oh, D.A Confidential, that's so funny. I'm an Aussie who used to live in Texas, and everyone there would ask if I'm British. I guess we can't win. π
As far as heritage goes, I'm half Australian, half Greek, but I definitely favor the Greek side; I have the nose to prove it!
Oh yes, girl. All the time. I often get the thinly veiled, "So…where are you from?" question. I answer, "Maryland." And they blink, like, five times.
Living in a world where people are judged by their looks, I've gotten used to it.
Great post. I thought this was going to be about take out food.
You know, I also never visualized you as Sheila Tao. I mean, she looks nothing like you! (Also, did you hear? She's a SEX addict!)
Great post.
I'm as Scottish as they come. Think Sean Connery and Billy Connolly!
No one ever asks me but I have the BEST story for you!! I'm emailing it now. Although, I do think that was an odd question for an interviewer to ask. Does it matter?
Okay, okay, just tell them its really me… Well, I am one of your bff's and I am the Chinese one…
Loved Mohamed Mughal's answer! Great post! I can absolutely relate.
Yay for diversity and melting pots! π I think people are confused when they see my name (Bonilla) and then realize that I'm as white as they come. Whenever anyone asks about my name or how to pronounce it I say, you know, Bonilla. Rhymes with Tortilla. Since my own family is a melting pot (my husband is Hispanic) I appreciate diversity. All Asian, all the time! HAHAHA! LOVE IT!
All Asian, all the time! I like that response.
I am really nothing like my main character, Byron. Well, we're both perfectionists, but that's about it. I wouldn't fly a spaceship if you paid me, either!
Ah… some people… At least they thought you were the sex addict and not the sociopath. π I don't have to tell people I'm Irish.. the smell of whiskey in my coffee YELLS it LOUD AND CLEAR! π
I'm glad that we can admit that we at least notice the differences. I hate the concept of being "color blind." I think we should notice the differences and celebrate them. After all, like you said, everybody is a little something!
I definitely know what you mean about characters just kind of presenting themselves to you.
As for me, I'm white and boring, so I don't get that question a lot π Though, I have Native American blood, and some Irish and English and Hungarian and probably a lot of other stuff.
You should start making up your answers. Find a really, really remote corner of the world and claim it. π
It never even occurred to me to question the cultural diversity in your book, because it just…works.
I'm a blue-eyed, blonde (from a bottle these days). Growing up, I had Mexican, Chinese, and Japanese friends. Race never even entered into it, and it still doesn't.
Btw, I'm half n' half. German and Dutch. And I don't have either of my parent's coloring. Confuses the hell out of people.
One woman said to my mom, "It was so nice of you to adopt a disabled child." Mom's reply? "Well, she came out of me so I doubt she's adopted."
Do people ask you what you are? If so, what are you?
Iβm me
nearly all of the time
I dress like me
I talk like me
I eat like me
I sing (or to be more accurate donβt sing) like me
Except for times when Iβm not like me
But since don't recognise myself
It might not actually be me
but someone pretending to be me
So mostly itβs easier sticking to being me….
P.S. You can blame the Pearson Report for my visit
When I lived in NY, people always asked what I was (blonde Swede)…but in the Midwest, no one seems to care…so I think the Midwest is the real melting pot.
People ask, or just assume, that I'm fully American and have at some point lived in the States, since despite living in England my whole life, I have an American accent. Made for interesting conversations in university when people assumed I was a foreign student and asked me where in the States I was from. I always felt so boring afterwards!
Loved your answer to the interviewer!
Funny. My MC has long blonde hair and is Czech, but she's not me. And you are totally not Sheila. I didn't get that at all when I read it. Maybe people are just being creepily hopeful–would make book signings all kinds of interesting to be populated by psychopaths and sex addicts and ex-NFL players.
I understand it's frustrating, but to the person that doesn't have any frame of reference, it's the easy conclusion to draw.
Now, the way they have of asking this question up front is extremely rude, considering the nature of Sheila and her problems, but you know how it is. It's always easier to act before you think. I'm pretty sure you will end up finding this pretty humorous with time.
Your posts are so funny! Ha ha, one of my characters is Filipino, too – and it just so happens she's my favourite character. You're right, too, you don't see much diversity in mainstream fiction, and like you, it's something I'm happily embracing in my own fiction because… that's real life.
As the whitest white girl ever, I have never once been asked "what are you?" I would be tickled if anyone ever did ask me that.
But I also grew up in Southern California, which is the other multi-culturalest place in the world and I never really think about ethnicity or race. Not that it isn't interesting, but that I just honestly don't ever think about it.
I love the way you answered. π
People have asked me if I'm Japanese, but I'm actually Chinese. I can't blame them–I can't really tell the difference myself.
I love your response. I also like you you let your characters develop naturally.
My best friend is half Pakistani and half Irish, and honestly, "what ethnicity are you?" seems to be the starting point of pretty much all of her conversations. She makes people guess, for the humour of it.
I, like everyone else, love your response!
I do sometimes picture the author as the character. Even though Nabokov's picture on the back of Lolita proves him far too old (at the time) to be HH, I still pictured him as HH the entire time (..adding to the creepiness). Bad move!
I loved when you cast the characters in a blog post! I totally agreed on many accounts!
Thanks for the comments, guys! So interesting! Been sick with a horrible cold this week, but I'll be by today catching up on all of your blogs. π
Jen, I am so like you it's scary. You are the Canadian version of me π ha. notice i didn't say the "asian" or "filipino" version of me but the Canadian? lol. Anywoo, I enjoyed this post and will admit that I always wondered what you were (other than Canadian haha), but like you, it never really occurred to me to ask because it matters not.
Being that I'm Hungarian, Austrian, Swedish, and German and I married a man born and raised in Puerto Rico whose heritage is Spanish and French I have NO idea what the heck my kids will say if people ever ask them. I guess their safest answer would be–"I'm half mom, half dad, and all human." That about sums it up. π
I love the multicultural aspects of books when they are done because that's THE WAY THE CHARACTERS ARE. That's when it comes out best! And when it seems so natural and right.
I find it funny when people think the main character is based on the writer. It makes me wonder if it's what readers always assume (darn it!), and writers almost never assume. I guess it makes sense.
I've been pleasantly surprised by the diversity in some of my characters. I never really thought about creating them one way or another either. Their voices dictate who they become on the page and I run with it.
I used to get asked what I was all they time because my maiden name was so unusual. I'm 100% Finnish.