I just realized that I didn’t do a Top Ten Tuesday post this week. Of course, me and the gals were launching Killer Chicks, but still. Why didn’t you say anything?
Here are ten things I wish I could do, but can’t, for various reasons which may or may not require an explanation:
10. Eat peanut butter. Everybody seems to like peanut butter. I’m allergic, but I can imagine that if you like the taste of peanuts, peanut butter would be a lovely thing indeed. Just once I wish I could try it and see what the fuss is all about.
9. Run for hours without stopping. I am so not a long-distance runner. When I was a kid, I was a pretty fast sprinter, but I never had the stamina for long laps around the track.
8. Serve like John Isner. Probably helps to be 6’9″.
7. Sing opera. Without sounding like I’m being murdered.
6. Play the guitar.
5. Meet Stephen King. Just for coffee. And a doughnut. For an hour. We don’t even have to talk about books. We could talk about Sons of Anarchy.
4. Stand on the edge of very high cliff and look down without freaking out.
3. Have a snappy comeback when someone is rude to me. Why is it I always think of the exact right thing to say ten minutes after the moment has passed?
2. See all my friends. Every day. And no, Facebook doesn’t count.
1. Stop social networking. For thirty seconds every day, I fantasize about disappearing from Facebook and Twitter. They’re such time-sucks! But I stick around, because I hate to miss out on what’s going on.
What do you wish you could do?
(Psst… be sure to visit me at Killer Chicks today. It’s Free For All Friday! Answer our weekly question and win… well, nothing, but I’ll think warm and glowy thoughts about you if you participate. Non-writer friends, DON’T BE SHY! Killer Chicks is for you, too!)
I live on PB. I can't run at all, but can walk for hours/miles (did a 1/2 marathon in October). No desire for tennis, opera, or guitar (tho I'm trying to learn to play a keyboard…I'm failing…dismally). With you on coffee and King. Would settle for not freaking at the top of a flight of unfamiliar stairs. Would like to sick one of my serial killers on the rude people of the world. Would never get writing done if I was always visiting with friends. And that's why I don't do Facebook.
I hear you about the snappy comebacks! I can always riddle them with ridicule after they're long gone. 🙂
Can you do almonds? If so, give almond butter a try. I love it a million times more than peanut butter. Totally with you on the running thing. I might actually be able to if I got in shape, but that's a lot of work. Jen, WOW!!! a 1/2 marathon? So cool. Oh god yes, please let me meet Stephen King before I die. Heights – I'm too terrified of them to wish I could overcome. Most of the things I wish for are impossibilities (more time with my mom, closer family, etc.), but focusing on writerly ambitions helps, so I'll right now wish for a book deal. There! GREAT POST.
Mmm, peanut butter! A critical food group in my dietary square (the pyramid is soo 1980s!).
Things I wish I could do…
* Write More. Just more than my usual pecking and pawing at the keyboard.
* Play Chess at the Grandmaster level. I have been working on my studious, concentrating stare, but my game still lacks any semblance of skill.
* Run blackjack tables like the kids in the movie '21.' Bills piling up? Rent due? Head to Vegas and withdraw cash from the world's biggest ATM!
* Teleport. And be the only one who could teleport. I simply shudder to think about the consequences if a government or a militant group figured out teleportation.
* Drive a tank to work – on the interstate. No-one would ever camp in the left lane cruising at 25 mph.
JB: Yes, serial killers don't need a snappy comeback, do they? They'll just make you bleed.
DL: I always win arguments… IN MY HEAD.
Joann: Glad you said it! Gotta put those vibes into the universe, woo hoo!
G3: Fabulous wishes. Particularly love teleporting, and driving a tank to work. Who'd dare cut you off?
I'd like to meet Mr. King also. We drove by his house last summer in Bangor, Maine, and snapped a few photos. I wanted to knock on his door with one of my tattered manuscripts in hand, but I restrained myself. I've heard he really values his privacy.
I wish I could kick ass like they do in movies. No guns, no knives – just with my own body. I want to be a bad ass to back up this mouth that I have on me. I keep saying I'm going to take Krav Maga. THAT would make me a bad ass. I could do hand to hand street combat if I needed to. You never know. It could come in handy. Although with my short fuse, it might be a good thing that I don't have that ability…Just kidding.
I wish I could dance well.
I'd like to meet J.K. Rowling (though I think I'd like to meet Stephen King too).
I'm sorry you're allergic to peanut butter. Almond butter is pretty similar. Have you tried it?
Almond butter is DE-LICIOUS! I tried it on my own because I, like you, also have the peanut allergy. Almond butter is also better for you! 🙂 Here's my list.
10. Like Jenny, eat the following without death/anaphylactic shock occuring:
– Fish (fish stick, Filet-o-Fish, beer battered, tempura-ed, baked, fried, in a can) ANYTHING! I love fish!
– Crab (particularly crab salad, it always looks so tasty)
– Any nuts I am allergic to (that's every nut except: hazelnuts, almonds, and macadamias), I would love to be able to stick my paw in a bowl of trail mix and chomp away!
9. Run at all. Any kind of running induces my asthma to the point of no return. I feel for you on this one Jenny.
8. Learn to keep my mouth shut. I tend to voice my opinion any and all the time, even when it's not called for. Most of the time people say I'm blunt, but I really know they mean "bitch". 🙂
7. I could micro-manage my budget to the penny. I might not be in so much debt otherwise!
6. Turn the clock back and stick to my dancing. All those years of dancing for me to say, "I quit" because I found a boyfriend in highschool – he was so not worth it.
5. Like to clean. I do it. But hate it. I think I would be productive if I enjoyed it.
4. Remember every recipe by heart when I cook.
3. Meet and marry the man of my dreams (Keanu Reeves – yes I am aware he can't act, but he looks damn good)
2. Sincerely get along with people who don't have a sense humor. I always feel like I'm not myself when talking to people who just don't get my sometimes whacky/humorous personality!
1. Find more "real" friends. There are very few people in the world I call real friends. It's a sad thing I know, but been burned to many times to have that lesson learned again.