Jennifer Hillier

How it really feels to release a new book

May 8, 2018 | Jar of Hearts, Newsletter, Personal

(Note: this is a repost of my May 1, 2018 newsletter. To subscribe and enter to win an ARC of JAR OF HEARTS, sign up here.)

We’re exactly six weeks away from the JAR OF HEARTS release . . .

and folks ask me every day if I’m excited to see my book out in the world. Of course, my answer is yes. It’s really exciting, so exciting that I get butterflies in my stomach when I think about it, which turns into nausea if I think about it while I’m eating. For the most part, I’m sleeping just fine… every other night.

I have to be honest: it’s stressful. There’s no way around it. I’m a fiction writer, which means that while this book may have been seeded by certain true events (serial killers Karla Homolka and Paul Bernardo, if you watched my first video), the story is a figment of my imagination. And readers will react to it subjectively, and have opinions, and sometimes opinions can be harsh, and at the end of the day, I’m just a girl, standing in front a reader, asking them to love her (book).

(Okay, I just threw up a little in my mouth typing that—I love the movie Notting Hill, but I’ve always hated that sappy line. It’s only slightly less worse than “You complete me” from Jerry Maguire, which is an otherwise great movie. Barf.)

See how testy I am? Book releases do this to me! I’m a chill person, normally. I’M NICE, DAMMIT. Sorry.

You’d think by now I’d have a better handle on all of it, but increased visibility means increased stress. My most important job is writing, yes. But my second most important job—at least for the next little while – is talking about what I’ve written. And I’m not a natural salesperson, so this part is really hard for me. I don’t ever tell someone I’ve just met what I do unless they ask directly, and even then I don’t mention what kind of books I write unless they press. I’m shy!

Which leads to the question that all writers hate to get asked: how’s the next book going? (Because hopefully there’s always a next book). Well, it’s going slower than I’d like. I have what I feel is a rock-solid idea, but it’s been hard to get into a groove because I’m always talking about JAR OF HEARTS. And this is just how it is right now. Will I finish the next book? Heck, yeah. I’ve never not finished a book I’ve started, ever. It would… bother me. It would feel like getting my fur rubbed the wrong way. I’m a little obsessive about unfinished work (and I’ll talk more about how I’m handling this at the end of this newsletter).

Speaking of obsession, let’s throw it back for just a moment to my first book CREEP, which is about a popular college professor who’s stalked and terrorized by her student. I like to think of it as Fatal Attraction meets Disclosure. If, by some chance, you haven’t read it yet, it’s the Kindle Daily Deal for the month of May! Only $1.99 (which is cheaper than your morning latte).

 

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Have you been reading the news about the Golden State Killer? After more than three decades, they finally arrested the guy, and it turns out he used to be a police officer. Sound familiar? Maybe it’s because I wrote a story just like this back in 2014, about a retired chief of police who turns out to be a serial killer called  THE BUTCHER (and don’t worry, this isn’t a spoiler – I reveal this juicy nugget early on and the story starts from there). Man, I loved writing this book. Only took me seven weeks to write the first draft. But four years later, I’m still getting angry emails about my villain, Edward Shank. What can I say, he’s not a nice guy. Villains usually aren’t.

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Okay, enough about my books. I’ve read a whole bunch of great books written by other people lately, and I want to tell you about some of them. If you like my stuff, there’s a good chance you’ll enjoy these:

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ARE YOU SLEEPING by Kathleen Barber

Guys. I had no idea Kathleen Barber was a debut author, because every part of this book is masterfully written. It’s Serial with a dose of Twitter, wrapped up in a terrific psychological thriller.

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THE LAST MRS. PARRISH by Liv Constantine

I ate this up like candy. It’s told from alternating points of view by a woman who’s deliberately working her way into a relationship with a married man, and the wife who has no clue what her new “friend” is doing. Both have secrets, and so does the husband. Unapologetic and dishy, this one’s a fun ride.

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THE WOMAN IN THE WINDOW by A.J. Finn

Anna is an alcoholic agoraphobe who only observes the outside world from her window, and then she witnesses a violent crime. Some readers think this book is slow, and I can understand why. But I think the pace is deliberate – it’s a subtle burn that builds (and for what it’s worth, it didn’t feel slow to me). I can admit, as a reader, I’m not always the savviest person when it comes to predicting stuff, but I was genuinely knocked sideways by the twist. Definitely worth a read.

 

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THE RETREAT by Mark Edwards – coming May 10

Full disclaimer: Mark is a friend of mine. But I was a fan before he was a friend, and the guy is crazy talented. He writes the perfect blend of thriller-horror stories that are genuinely terrifying. His latest takes place at a writers’ retreat, run by a woman with a mysterious past. This is Mark’s scariest – and best – book yet.

Say, do you follow me on Instagram? If you don’t, I seriously question your stalking ability, because I WAY overshare over there. Instagram is my favorite social media place to hang out, because there’s no drama, just pictures. And book reviewers have been really generous (and creative!) about sharing their snaps. Pictures like these warm the cockles of my heart:

 

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Before I forget, I have another winner to announce! Congratulations, Leslie Welsh, you have won an ARC of JAR OF HEARTS! Please send your mailing address to jenniferhillierbooks@gmail.com.
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One last thing. You’re going to think I’m nuts, but I’ve been writing large chunks of my next book on my phone. I know, so ridiculous. I wish I was joking. But so much of writing (for me, anyway) is about how well I can trick myself into believing I’m actually capable of writing a book that anyone will want to read. So I have to play mind games with myself. Right now, a mind game that’s working is to write entire chapters of this next novel directly into the Notes app on my iPhone (which instantly saves to my iCloud). Chelsea Cain once talked about the necessity of self-delusion in this interview on LitReactor, and so much of what she said resonated with me.

The best I can explain it is that my phone, unlike my computer, doesn’t scare me. I normally write on a 27″ iMac – I’ve had televisions smaller than this! But these days, nothing is more intimidating to me than a gigantic blank white page in Word, taunting me to write a story that will somehow be a worthy follow-up to JAR OF HEARTS. Back in the day, this technique worked in a more old-fashioned way – I’d switch to writing in an actual notebook. With an actual pen. But now my handwriting sucks, so the 2018 version of this trick is my iPhone. In the past few days, I’ve written ten thousand words with two thumbs. Again, I wish I was joking, but a writer’s gotta do what a writer’s gotta do.

Pressure, yo. You make diamonds… or you just get squished.

Until next time, friends.

Jenny

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